Tuesday, September 8, 2015

5 Tips for Long Distance Friends

Hey y'all! I hope you had an excellent LDW! I'm always thankful for a long weekend and am just trying to get acclimated to working again. Yuck. My weekend was everything I had hoped it would be and reminds me why I can't wait to move back closer to my family. They're the best! Moving away was one of the best things that's happened to me from a growth perspective, but it has also caused strain in different areas that I hadn't planned for. Being so far from home has made many relationships different- not just those with my family.
friendship, long distance friendship
I honestly had a hard time dealing with being away from my friends at first. Not only did I miss them, but I harbored strange feelings towards them- feelings that I'm not proud to admit. I had this ugly surge of jealousy and loneliness when I saw photos of everyone hanging out without me. I knew that I wasn't there, so I shouldn't be upset to be excluded, but it still hurt. It took me many months to finally realize that I couldn't expect my friends to just put their lives on hold until I returned. I was the one who moved away- but they were all still together, in our city. That was hard for me. I think what made it most difficult for me is that I wasn't expecting anything to change. Our relationships would be different, but that didn't mean they'd be worse! Although it takes more effort, it is possible to have your friendships survive (and thrive!) through a long distance friendship. Here are 5 tips for long distance friends:

Understand that things will be different. You may not talk every single day or even every week, but truly good friendships are able to pick up right where you left off when you do talk again. Embrace the changes of your relationship and put effort into the time that you do get to spend together! Don't focus on the quantity of conversations, but rather the quality of your conversations. I think that acceptance is the first step to happiness with the changes you'll experience!

Schedule out Skype/FaceTime dates. Being able to see each other makes the conversation feel 100x more personal. Facial expressions and body language can be key to understanding what someone is saying. You truly miss out on an important factor if you restrict yourselves to phone/text/email conversations. It's also a fun thing to look forward to and helps me battle homesickness!

Stay connected with social media. While FaceTime conversations are awesome, you can't realistically have each and every conversation that way. Even if I haven't talked directly with a friend in a little bit, I love seeing what they are up to and chiming in on their Instagram/Twitter/Facebook postings. That's a great way to feel closer to them! Additionally, Snapchat makes for a fun platform to go back and forth- and can also let you see their lovely faces.

Send care packages! This is one of my favorite things. I can honestly think of few things that make me more excited than an unexpected package! There are so many opportunities to get creative and really show your friends how much they mean to you. A few months ago, I got a package with the most darling prints to hang up in my apartment after mentioning that I was having trouble finding the perfect wall decor. It was so touching and thoughtful that my sweet friend took the time to help me with something I brought up.

Plan getaways. Everyone loves (and deserves) a good vacation! And what is more fun than a weekend/week away with your besties? Not only does this give you something to look forward to, but it's a great opportunity to create new memories with your friends. Plus, it makes for a fun reason to plan and dream together!

How do you make your long distance friendships thrive? What have you learned from them?


  1. These are so great! Definitely agree with one- many people get devastated when their friendships just aren't the same after going long distance, and you can't expect them to be! That doesn't mean you still can't have an amazing friendship.

    Courtney//As We Stumble Along

  2. These tips are so great. When my best friend was living about an hour away scheduling weekend getaways and keeping up with each other on social media is what kept our relationship strong!

  3. All of my best friends from college live on the west coast and I'm stuck here on the east! I like what you said about scheduling time to talk to each other and focusing on the quality of your conversations vs. the quantity - it really helped me to sustain these friendships. I make it a point to visit my friends at least once a year - usually for a big event so that we all have an excuse to go together (this year, it was a music festival).

    Alessandra | blog.pumpup.com

  4. I love this! My best friend lives in west texas and I'm in oklahoma so i can definitely relate!

  5. Love your tips! My two best friends are in NC and FL and we're really good at making phone call dates...it's just a time we both dedicate to each other to catch up. We do it 1-2x a month and while the call usually lasts for hours and our boyfriends get mad @ us that we're on the phone for so long, it's worth every minute. x Nicole | www.changeanddress.com

  6. I really struggled with this. It's so hard to not get upset when you see YOUR friends in YOUR town doing all the same thing you ALL used to do! This post really hits home, and I love all of your tips!

  7. These are all really good tips! I totally understand your feelings of jealousy and loneliness. It's hard seeing your friends going about their lives without you.

    Kayla | kaylablogs.com

  8. Such great tips! I feel like my friends and I spread out everywhere after graduation, and I don't see them or talk to them nearly as much as I would like to.

    XX, SS || A Little Seersucker Sass

  9. Lovely tips!
    All of my close friends live in different cities so good communication is essential to keep our friendship going.

    xoxo, Jenny || Breakfast at Lillys

  10. Long distance friendships are definitely difficult and can feel really sad. I have friends who live far away and though it is difficult we stay close using some of your tips.

  11. These are amazing...especially considering the majority of my friends are thousands of miles away from me!

    The Fashionista's Diary

  12. All of the ring true to me! Nobody ever thinks about what happens after college, but it's so important to keep those relationships up!

    Nicole // Chronicling Home

  13. This is perfect!! All of my best friends live in different cities or states than me, and I definitely love all of these tips! Having quality conversations over quantity is a must!

    xo Ashley

  14. Such great tips! All my best friends are in touch even after 4 years of passing-out from college!

  15. These are great tips! My best friend is currently studying abroad in Florence, so it has been really hard not being able to see her all the time. We talk almost daily!

  16. Lovely tips! It's amazing how we can go a few weeks without talking because our lives get busy with work, and family and we just pick up right where we left out with Skype and Facetime sessions. I love when my friends will let me talk with their kids to let them know "auntie Shea" misses them. Thanks for sharing!

  17. It really is hard to stay close as a long distance friend! I text and snapchat frequently and visit when I can!

  18. These are all helpful tips/reminders, one of my bestie's moved back to France and I miss her all the time, while skyping is a must, it's still hard not having daily friendship text/shopping/lunch so I can totally relate to you being a bit jealous of her other friends and posts, I felt the same way.


  19. This is a great post, unfortunately for me when I left for college I lost nearly all of my friends from high school. It definitely was a hard year for me, but it happens!


  20. I need to make it a point to Skype with my long distance friends! These were fabulous tips.

    xo, Alicia | Alicia Tenise

  21. Such phenomenal tips! My best friend is out of state right now, so there are super helpful :) Especially the care packages!

  22. these are great tips! my best friend for high school lives in dc and I live in florida so we use these a lot!


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